The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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