He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
