Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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