they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
