Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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