No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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