And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
