Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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