We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
