he shaved USA in his pubs
worst night to have a conscience
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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