So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
