Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
