I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
