Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize