i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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