I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
