i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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