Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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