dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
