member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
