so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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