Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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