Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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