glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
