Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
