i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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