Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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