How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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