I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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