garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
