after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
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