Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
