Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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