I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
