Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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