what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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