i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
