He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
