So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
