I love black thongs
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
