he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
