Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
