Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
