my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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