Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
