just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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