why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
