We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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