I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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