i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
